"I told him I’m trying but he doesn’t know what it's like, and he wasn’t there for the two weeks I was suffering in the hospital nor did he witness what the baby went through."
It had only been a few weeks since this woman gave birth to her third child and while she was going through "so much pain," she hoped that she could count on her husband to understand how difficult I was for her and that she needed time to recover.
However, the mother revealed that her husband lashed out instead of showing any empathy. The husband was not even there beside her when she went through the tough parts after the birth. For two weeks, the husband was not there to support the mother after she had just given birth.
Explaining their situation on Reddit, the woman revealed that most of the work has been falling on the husband and one night, he blew up. "...Tonight we had a fight about me needing to do more," the woman wrote. "I told him I’m trying but he doesn’t know what its like and he wasn’t there for the two weeks I was suffering in hospital nor did he witness what the baby went through."
"He than started screaming I was throwing it his face," the new mom added. "Obviously I know it wasn’t his fault he couldn’t visit but I was just trying to explain what I was going through, he then started saying I was probably pretending because I was back to myself within days of our other kids."
Although the husband was not there for the two weeks after the birth, the woman pointed out during their fight that the husband knew how difficult the labor was and despite that he was reacting with no patience. "He was there while i went through hours of labour then rushed to the operating room because we were basically both dying," the woman said.
The room went silent for a few seconds after the woman told her husband that he saw her and their baby fighting for their lives. Then, the husband calmly said, "I wished you died watching you on that bed I prayed you’d bleed out."
Shocked beyond imagination by those cruel words, she said nothing and went to check on their baby. She needed time to begin to process it. When she came back to their room, she found the husband getting into bed. "I asked him about it he first tried denying it than said he didn’t mean it like that," the woman said.
"...When I wouldn’t drop it he told me f*ck off he was going to sleep and ignored me," said the wife, who was pushed to tears by his hurtful words.
Even though she wanted to be a "good mom," she said, "body won’t allow me," and she asked readers for any advice they could offer her.
One user, RoseGoldHopes said that the words he used, "I wished you died watching you on that bed I prayed you’d bleed out" could not be something that came out in the spur of the moment. "That is not something you say out of stress or anger," the user said. "That's a loaded statement. I'm not sure how you can just move on from that. Either take the kids and go to your parents house or have them or a close friend stay with you."
Another user, MainstreamMolly2 said, "I certainly wouldn't be quick to forgive him. What he said was heinous. Literally marriage ending. This is not your fault. You did not cause this. A normal human would be helping their spouse and child... A family therapist would be the VERY minimum if you ever want to move forward. Personally, I would be looking for alternative arrangements."
"Your body won’t allow you to be a good mom?! Excuse me?! I’m sorry, but your body is just fine," wrote CAgirl17. "You literally just gave birth. The issue here is your shitty excuse for a husband. How dare he. You don’t need to do anything to fix this. What you need is support. I don’t care how tired or mad you are, there is absolutely no excuse to say this. I don’t know if I could get past my SO being such a piece of sh*t, and wishing death on me. I mean, therapy is a start, but the fixing all needs to come from him. Not on you at all."